July 15, 2008

• Ramblings and putting things in motion

  Last night I decided to put something in motion. I’d been thinking about it for several days, hemming and hawing about whether or not I could actually do it.  The doubt, for those who may be curious, was not in my ability to accomplish the thing, but in my ability to be consistent in accomplishing it.

  I’m one of those people, who can get focused for a period of time, and then…life just interferes, and I completely get off track. I guess many people are like that. When there is too much to focus on, it can be that way.

  I was reading this book last night, I think it’s called, “I became a Christian and all I got was this lousy Tee-shirt.” It’s an amusing book, and this pastor has a sort of wacked sense of humor, but he does make his points.

  As much as I can remember of the section I read, and considering I was pretty sleepy when I read this; he was talking about walking with speed, versus walking with love.

   

  I guess it’s our goal-making mentality that causes us to place time restraints on everything. His example was when his sister’s baby had died, and he took the opportunity to minister to his mother and brother-in-law. He had an entire speech ready when he went into the hospital to be there for his sister, who had asked him to try to speak to them. None of it mattered. They were unmoved.

   

  His wife went and was just there, and even after he left and flew back home, she stayed an additional week, just being there for them. His point was that his method was walking with speed, and hers was walking with love, because she demonstrated her faith by her actions, not by words. He figured that long term, she would have a greater effect than he did.

   

  What was my point? I said this to point out the fact that those of us who aspire to the fantastic organizational skills we see in others, are, in our backwardness, seeking to become goal-setting, everything-in-its-proper-place people, when in reality, God calls us to live life moment by moment, and not to sweat the small stuff. He calls us to walk in love, not speed.

   

  Yesterday, starringsarah posted a lot of nice pics showing a beautiful apartment in Chicago. I, in my muddle of misery at my lack of organization, was looking at these pics and thinking, “Why can’t I have a beautiful, spotless apartment like that?” Actually, that apartment is so spotless, it doesn’t look lived in. It looks like a model for showing apartments. Pretty though.

   

  Now admittedly, part of the problem, aside from too many things on the platter, is laziness. See, this is why I actually need to be wealthy, because I have always known that there were so many more interesting things to be doing than to be bothered with something like housework. I’m not the queen of domesticity, but I do like things neat and organized.

   

  So in the spirit of breaking free of at least a portion of my laziness, I determined to get more active and started taking my son out of the house a bit more frequently. That was stage one. I enacted stage two today.

   

  Although the dreariness of the current rain wouldn’t tell you this, it was a gorgeous morning, and I woke up by alarm at 6am; got up at 6:25 and got dressed after retrieving my bottom half from the car. Yeah, I know that sounds funny. It’s the bottom half of my swimsuit.

   

  I decided that I’m going to get up at 6am in the mornings, and hit the beach walking for some exercise. So today, not being really clear on how I would do the getting wet part of this exercise, I got to the pier and started walking.

   

  I set my sights on a set of condos that were probably a mile from the pier, and headed towards them. Having arrived in dusters (those slip-on suede shoes people get for work that are really comfortable) I walked down by the water and pulled them off; sticking my keys plus cell into one shoe, and my fingers through the loops on the back to carry them.

   

  I was wearing a stretchy sort of yoga pant and a sleeveless tee over my suit, and my pant legs were getting wet, but I didn’t care. It felt good, and it wasn’t hot yet.

   

  The only difficulty I was having was in the fact that my left ankle felt a little uncomfortable due to the angle of the beach and sinking into the sand. For those who don’t know, my left leg was damaged in a biking/car accident, in which I was basically sideswiped on the bike by a car 8 years ago. I had a double fracture to the ankle and the knee, and the ankle still has a bit of swelling (edema) as well as stiffness and inflexibility. The knee sometimes feels weak like it will slip.

   

  But nevertheless, I plodded on through the angled sand and water, determined to get to those condos. I did pretty well actually, coming within a few buildings of them; but by that time, I was pretty hot and wanted to take a dip, so I figured I’d dip and then maybe proceed on.

   

  The dip was nice; water cool and clear, and a low tide. No big waves, just small to medium swells and minor irritants. I got in, got low into the water, and started back floating. I really didn’t have to go out far, but I could have because the tide was so low. But the fish were, I guess, trying to figure out what this big thing casting a shadow in the water was, and so, they kept nipping at me.

   

  Outside of that, back floating allows me to relax my neck, back and shoulders, and I basically cross the arms behind my head, as well as my legs, and just chill. Its great alone time to talk to God, and also gives one an interesting view and perspective of the seagulls and pelicans as they fly directly over you.

   

  I was on my way back to the pier about 45 minutes later, walking on the street near the beach, which by that time, was beginning to get hot. It was almost 8am, and aside from the new construction, the street still had shade, so it was easier. All in all, it was a great morning.

   

  After that, I went home and got ready for my meeting with FAU’s small business dept., where I was referred to another counselor who happens to be Christian, and has also written a book. She will be able to give me a much better perspective on what I will need to do, and how to do it, so all in all, I had a great morning. Peace and blessings.

  • 1:07 pm
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