November 27, 2007

• BUT GOD!

  So I’m up really late here…yawning, but happily content. Why? Well…first, I got rid of the futon! I had the equivalent of 5 beds in this house. The full size futon, which the church’s thrift store picked up today; a single futon, which is currently in my living room as my loveseat, and the rollaway bed in the storage room, as well as my current bed and my son’s bed, both of which are solid, good beds.

  I finally have no need to keep the big futon. I always have these around, because of “bed issues,” meaning for example, the last bed I personally had was given to me by pops because my previous futon bed broke, and I was sleeping on the double full size mattresses on the floor. Pops gave me his old bed when he bought the new one, and I took the futon mattresses and put them on the box spring to help support the mattress which had a big sagging area in the middle.

  Well…turns out that mattress was very comfortable on top of those two futon mattresses, (which btw, gave me a rather elevated bed, slightly reminiscent of the princess minus the pea.) but I needed a pillow under my knees for low back support. (I still need that now with the newest mattress/boxspring I got…at a major steal…like new from the thrift store…$40 for both! So lately…I’ve been sleeping in luxurious comfort on my elevated (yes, still…) mattress above the futons.

  But today…aside from getting rid of that big futon which took up tremendous space in my living room, I’m happy for another reason…actually several, but one I will focus on.

  I think I mentioned that I am now a Mary Kay consultant. I am also working on my writing career, and in the midst of researching with the intention of initiating a non-profit organization.

  At the time that I was debating on what option I was going to go for (being offered 3 at one time), when God told me to do the Mary Kay. So the same Thursday nite that He given me my answer on this (actually, He told me during that day), I told Him that He would have to bring me the people He wanted me to help, because that is my reason for getting into Mary Kay in the first place.

  So that same nite, I meet this lady Deidra. After several weeks of missed connections, and reminders from God about this lady, I finally see her in church Sat. and arrange to pick her up today to take her to the business office for a facial/makeover class.

  So we get there and when Samra starts explaining what everyone will be doing…she freaks out and gets nervous, saying that she never has used makeup and is afraid to do so. Now understand…this lady has a slight speech impediment, and I don’t know what this is called, but her eyes go in different directions. No one has ever taken the time with her…more often than not, to even listen to her. They just blow her off.

  So here she is shaken and starting to cry, and I ask her why she’s crying. She says that she never put on makeup because she never wanted to attract any other man than her husband. Her husband has an alcohol problem, and apparently from the little she’s told me…he’s abused her. Apparently…society as a whole has abused her. She has just started to be strengthened because her husband is gone, and she’s by herself with God. 

  I reminded her that she and God are doing a new thing, and He’s strengthening her, and changing her life as evidenced by her husband’s changing attitude from indifference and taking her for granted, to caring and missing his wife, and being tender with her when he does see her. She said that before, she was always running behind him, being nice and loving to him while he treated her like garbage. The picture is now changing, and I told her that God has them apart right now, so that he can not only get himself together, but learn to appreciate what he has.

  I told her that since God is doing all of this for her, and bringing beautiful changes into her life, that she should try the facial and the makeup just to see what God was going to do with it for her life. So she stopped crying and agreed to try it. I told her I would help her. So she did the facial cleansing and I coached her. Then I did her makeover.

  If you could have seen this woman’s reaction just from trying the skin care products. Her skin had never been cared for…she had never been pampered in any way. Her skin looks like the skin of someone who is homeless, because she is constantly in the sun waiting for buses to get to Publix where she works. She loved the skin care products, and kept remarking how nice her skin felt.

  When I put the foundation on her and smoothed it around her face, evening her skin tone…and she saw her skin…she was so enthused. She loved it…and I hadn’t even done anything yet. As I was applying her makeup, she kept looking in the mirror and saying…”I can’t believe how beautiful I am. My mother always told me I was beautiful, but I never believed it…I never saw it, but I can see it now.” She was crying. I could hardly get her eyemakeup on for all her crying. And she kept thanking me over and over. She said no one had ever done anything like this for her before. No one had ever taken the time to be bothered with her.

  When my director called me to the front as a new consultant, and asked me in front of all the ladies, guests and all, why I got into this…I said…”To help women.” The girl next to me that had already answered, said she liked my answer better.

  When my director was asking the guests what they liked about the products, Deidra said “Everything!” and began to explain that no one had ever done anything like that for her, and that she had been afraid to put makeup on; saying how she cried and everything. All the women were like…”Awwww.” Prior to her saying all of this…I could see that some of them had dismissed her with a look, but now…suddenly…they all understood, when I said, “That is why this one is my favorite makeover that I’ve done so far.”

  So when I dropped Deidra off, I told her that I would come over and help teach her how to use the makeup up…she needs lots of practise (coordination issues I think) to learn how to use the products. I also told her…”Let’s do a total makeover…since God is changing your life.”

  I suggested a change of hairstyle…she has a very unflattering blunt haircut…like a neck length bob. I suggested some layers and a hairdresser I know. I also told her that if she wanted, I could help her pick out a special outfit, or some new clothes to give her something more flattering to wear, because every time I’ve seen her at church…she’s in what looks like logger shirts (maybe her husband’s) and she said her mother bought everything in black for her because she used to be much heavier.

  So I’m going with her next week to help her create her new look…free. She says God has blessings for me in heaven. I say…I’m already blessed here and now. And helping her…it made me realize how many people…women in particular… who do not fit society’s beauty standards…are overlooked and ignored. Whether they are just not generally attractive in features or are overweight, reclusive, or what-have-you…I started seeing these women as well as my mission…the cancer patients.

  I also saw the ones in prisons…my mission is expanding. As I explained to Deidra…makeup and fashion…is a natural thing for me (as she knows…I look different every time she sees me at church)…so it is nothing for me to help her…and I’m blessed to be able to do that for her.

  I’m trying to think if I have any recent pics in the pc that I can post so you can see what I mean when I say it’s a natural thing for me. I know I have previous pics…shots I took when I thought I might be modeling…but that was a while ago. Well…I don’t know…you all tell me. Should I post the older ones? They’d certainly let you see my versatility if nothing else. I have nothing from this year that is in the computer now…just pics from the last couple of years and the modeling pics. I figure…I’ll let you guys decide, since I don’t think I’ve ever posted any pics of me on this particular site.

  OH! I almost forgot to tell you! I think I mentioned in a previous post about meeting that cancer patient in the Whole Foods Market on the day I decided on my non-profit business. So here I was, talking to her and telling her about that cancer fashion show I did, and I had given her my card, but forgotten to get her info. I left there, so wishing I had gotten it, becuase I decided that she would be the first one I blessed from my non-profit. So for the last week or so, since I met her…the week before thanksgiving, I had been just thinking about her and wishing I had gotten that info so I could keep in touch with her.

  BUT GOD! Saturday…I’m in the Daily Grill with two girlfriends…both of whom are MK consultants, and we are talking at a table by the snack bar. I go to the counter to get the pizza Lori and I ordered, and who is standing in the line, but this same woman from WholeFoods. I’m flippin’!

  I start screaming and hug her, and she’s just shocked, because I’m so daggone glad to see her, and she can’t quite remember who I am, as she saw me sans the glamour look in my running around, everyday casual, no makeup look.  I looked a little familiar, but she couldn’t place me. I reminded her, and told her how much I had wanted to get in touch with her, and here God goes and puts her right into my path again! So I invited her to sit with us, and we were all talking and Deb asked her alot of questions about the cancer. She really educated us on it.

  I actually had a dream this morning…uh…yesterday morning at this point, in which I was actually feeling the effects and the sensations of the treatment…the chemo. It was like I had it and could feel what a woman in that position was going through. It was awful, and I’m sure I only got a glimpse.

  But what blew my mind was the fact that they were using poison to defeat poison. That just didn’t make sense to me. In my mind’s eye…I saw family curses, and pain, and a spirit of bitterness as well as liver malfunction as the cause, because if the body cannot properly deal with toxins…a buildup occurs and disease sets in.

  I also saw a failure to let go as one of the sources of the cancers. I asked God to make me a vessel of healing, and I now understand why He has wanted me to research sickness in scripture. So…yeah…my mind is whirling. There’s so much to do…so many hurting, and I want to share God’s love for them. It will be great. Peace and blessings to all.

  • 1:21 am
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